So this is what they call a date…

I went on a lunch date yesterday, and I use the term loosely.

We met up at Yonge & Bloor subway station and after a game of phone tag to try and locate each other we walked around the underground mall there. I had never been there before so that was cool, but he kept saying he had no idea where we were. This should have been my first clue, as most malls are built in giant squares, as is this one. There is no real concern about getting lost, because it all comes back around.

Next we went outside, and headed off to find the Chapters, but he insisted that we were heading south, when really we were heading north. I don't really mind since I like to walk, and it wasn't that cold out so we walked north on Yonge for about 20 minutes. Just as I'm starting to get cold he suggested that we go into the Quail and Firkin for a beer, and I'm happy for the heat, so I agree.

At this point everything is still good, he's trying to discuss religion and faith, which is one of the three things that I was taught never to discuss. (Religion, Money, Politics) I figure I'm a big girl and can hold my own, so I let him go on, slide in a point or two and then change the subject. We sit down and he looks at the menu for about 10 minutes and then announces that nothing on the menu is catching his eye, but to go ahead if I want something. Obviously I'm not going to eat if he's not going to, so when the waitress comes back around, I assume that he will order a drink, but he says he's still deciding.

Weird, but okay.

After about another 10 minutes and the poor waitress coming around twice, I say to him, "You wanted a beer, right?" Finally, he orders a beer and I order a drink and we, and drink them, talking, a few awkward lulls in the conversation but we're virtual strangers so that's to be expected, and we seemed to be getting along fairly well. The bill arrives after we decline a second drink, or rather he declines for us.

Now here's where it gets weird.

He grabs the bill, and says, "I think I have $10 on me," and proceeds to rifle through his wallet.

He really only has $10 on him, I can see this because he's all but dumping his wallet on the table to pull out two $5 bills.

I offered to pick up the cheque, because I can see that it's $11.50, he has only $10, and I really don't mind picking up the bill, I'm going to offer at least and wouldn't be offended if he had accepted.

He says no, and asks if I have a twoonie.

…

I say, "I have a five."

He says, "No, just a twoonie."

I give in and pull out a twoonie and hand it to him and cringe internally because I know that he's only leaving the poor waitress a $0.50 'tip' but he won't let me leave the $5 bill,.

We walk back south on Yonge St, we get to the first subway station and I suggested we just ride north from there and then change trains at Bloor because it's cold out and I figure we'll save some time, he looks at me and says "Oh, I don't have change."

I assume that he means that he's thinking "I have a Metropass and I'm not sure whether you have tokens or what, so I'll wait till we get to Bloor and then we'll figure it out or it'll give me a way to make an escape."

Fine, I like walking, so I continue walking up to Yonge & Bloor station. We head back into the mall there and he announces he "has to pee" and asks if I know where the washroom is, so I go with him to the food court, I wait and we walk back to the subway. I find the token machine, because I need to pick some up for work anyways, and I buy some tokens. He stood behind me being shifty awkward while I did that.

Fine. Whatever.

And then, he looks at me as I'm about to walk through the gate and says, "Can I bum a token?"

Um, okay.

He then says, "I was planning on coffee, this is really embarrassing."

WHAT?!?

At this point, internally I'm peaking, but I'm not going to leave the boy standing at the gate so I hand him a token, and head down to the subway. He follows like a lost puppy and asks if I'm going east or west.

Me: East.

Him: My place is west.

Me: I'm still going east.

Him: Oh, okay. Well, it's been interesting.

Me: Yup, well, here's my train. Catch you later!

Who goes out on a date with $10 total in their pocket?

Who suggests a date knowing he's strapped for cash?

Who budgets for a coffee date and then suggests beer?

Who won't let the girl just pick up the tab when she offers?

Who "bum's a token"?

I just don't get it.