A long weekend...

You have to love a long weekend, it's always interesting whether you intend to just relax, or not.

Friday night I received a call from Alana to let me know that she wasn't going to be able to come down for the weekend. Her car crapped out and they weren't going to be able to do much with it until Wednesday.  This wouldn't be a big deal except that she was supposed to be coming with me to Cherrybomb on Saturday night. E was tied up with some friends in town for the long weekend, and she wasn't going to be around to take me, and I really wanted to go. In fact, I was quite proud of myself for having decided to go without her, and Alana's car breaks down. Murphy's Law.

Fine, I decided I would skip it instead. It wasn't that big of a deal. I spent all of Friday night trying to minimize it in my head and make myself feel like I didn't want to go and I wasn't missing out. Epic fail. I still wanted to go and on Saturday morning when I woke up I was still pouting around my apartment and feeling pretty upset about not going.

Just after lunch on Saturday, I hop on Facebook and Lindsey is online, which is great because I happen to know she doesn't have plans for Saturday night. In fact, I've been trying to text her since Friday night, but not getting a response. Turns out, she left her cell phone at Seneca.

So, I message her and see if she's available to go, which she is after some convincing, and a promise to leave at a reasonable hour, namely 11:30 or midnight. My mood significantly improves, sure I don't get to dance until the birds start chirping, but I get to go out for a bit. Lindsey and I head out and get our hair done, have some supper at Sushi & BBQ and trek over to Cherrybomb to have some drinks.

Let's backtrack for a minute.  Some time after Lindsey decided she would come, E texts me and I let her know that Alana had canceled. She was super supportive and suggests that I go alone, but I have to admit, I'm just not there yet and I wouldn't have gotten through the door. I probably would have been able to get myself down there, and I might have even gotten as far as getting my ID checked, before I bailed out.

There are a few reasons for this, firstly, when I was showing up, I knew it was going to be quiet and it would be pretty obvious I was there on my own and a little uncomfortable. I would have felt the same about this at any bar or event, gay or straight. I just find this situation very awkward.

Secondly, if something went horribly awry, I would want to know that I had someone there to bail me out. I don't know what I thought would go so wrong, but there is a part of me that insists upon preparing for all eventualities.

Last, but not least, I found the thought of being around so many people who are really comfortable with who they are, while I'm still trying to work things out, a little overwhelming. It makes me feel like they would take one look at me and think that I'm faking. I don't know why. This probably warrants some further analysis, but that's for another blog.

Anyhow, Lindsey and I get down there, get through the door and sit down to have a drink. Well, I had a drink, she wasn't drinking because she didn't want to get too caught up in the merriment and forget that we had to leave at midnight so that she wouldn't be too tired for Lost on Sunday, but I digress.

So, we sit down and I have a drink or two, and eventually a better table a little closer to the dance floor opens up and we move over there. We sit and watch and she is finally convinced that this is actually a lot of fun and she isn't nearly as uncomfortable as she expected to be. She admits that she is having a good time and that it's really comfortable here. I laughed when she said it, because I would have left with her if she was that uncomfortable, I just needed help getting through the door and getting through the part of the night where it's quiet and no one is dancing yet.

The music picks up, and all of a sudden a song we both know is on, and it seems that everyone else knows it too, because the 8 people on the dance floor, suddenly becomes 70, and it's enough that we can blend in and have a good time. We get up and dance. The next 45 minutes is all songs that we can sing along to, or that we've heard before at the very least, and we're having a great time.

All of a sudden, I notice some girl looking at me, with a big silly smile. She has sort of been dancing in the general vicinity of Lindsey and I, with a friend of hers, for a few minutes and we've all been having a great time so I don't really think much of it.

I barely have time to blink and she's dancing with me. I feel like a 14 year old writing this because dancing is just dancing and I shouldn't think anything of it, so I calm myself down, and keep dancing. She's cute, not really my type, but I can see the appeal. I figure we'll just dance for a bit and both move on, so no big.  We talk a little over the music, she says, "I love how tall you are." I laugh and say that the heels help, and smile.

E texts me to see what I'm doing, and I let her know that I'm dancing, having fun and that all is well.

Flash forward about half an hour. We're still dancing together, and this is when she decides that she wants to kiss my neck. Oh, okay. I've missed something here. I step back a little, and she steps towards me and grabs my hands to put them on her waist, as she turns around to face away from my, she pulls one of my arms up and across her chest. At this point I start to get really uncomfortable, luckily she is quite short, and I'm quite tall in the heels. So, I shoot Lindsey a look over her head, and Lindsey asks if she can borrow me to go to the washroom. I smile and apologize and say that it was nice dancing with her, and we go sit on the pool hall side of things.

Lindsey laughs, and says, well even if she's not your type, you still did better than me this evening. I have to laugh too, because I expect to be the invisible girl in the crowd, and maybe I'm not. That's exciting. We have another drink and head home.

I get home, and E and I text back and forth a little before I pass out. I missed her at the bar, because she would have caught that I was a little uncomfortable much faster, but it was also good to go and kind of work it out for myself. I think if I wanted to go and there was no one around, I could probably go down by myself. I think I would go later in the night, and I would still be nervous, but I would survive, and that's the main thing. It's sort of a nice feeling to realize that.

I have one more interesting story from this weekend, but that will have to wait until later because this girl hears her aunt starting the BBQ, and that means it is time for me to start making dinner.